Bruises aren't fun. They're actually kind of boring and aesthetically unpleasing. Bruises should look cool. They should be shaped like fire breathing dragons or machine guns or anything awesome like that. I want to be able to say, "Clumsy me. I walked into a door handle. Now I have this sweet ass bruise on my hip that's shaped like a highlander sword. Would you like to see it?" It would suck if a bruise was shaped like male or female genitalia. Talk about an insult to injury.
Bro 1: Aw man, that bruise on your crotch sure does look like a vagina.
Bro 2: Shut up. It's not a bruise. It's a hickey...Wait, how do you know about that?
It would suck if a bro got a bruise right above his butt and it was in the shape of a butterfly. And that bro couldn't wear anything other than belly shirts. Well...if he wore belly shirts then it would kind of explain the butterfly shaped bruise...or hickey. But who knows?
- Ryan
No comments:
Post a Comment